I couldn't get any sleep at all. I kept on thinking about it. I was trying to get over it by simply blogging about it. I followed the human's advice to simply blog about it, but it seems I was misunderstood in my post. I kept thinking hard last night on what to say to this blog post. I decided to come clean and tell the unrevealed truth. I just had the courage to write about this just now, these information that I kept to myself, not even telling anyone about it.

Deduction 1
Deduction 1 is really scary for me. Scary in the sense that someone will get hurt if this happens. I speculated that since the human longs for some affectionate attention, I think that the human is just feeding off the attention that the angel is giving him. But what if this need is already fulfilled? What would happen to the angel then? Now, this is what I had speculated, but is this the truth? I don't know! Only the human can tell us that!

Unrevealed truth
I am attracted to the angel. In the scale of 1 to 10, 10 being the highest I'm already at 3. I like him, not like like, LIKE! Admiration! I admire him because he's cool, smart, and opinionated. Like I told the human during our late night conversations, "In a parallel world, he could be my ideal guy."

I knew I had to stop myself. The 2nd tactical objective of the wall defense strategy was to stop myself from advancing. I was getting desperate because I know I can't stop myself especially that I had the means to go on. That is why I was reluctant to take the angel's number. It was a means.

After reading their reactions yesterday, I finally had the courage to erase the angel's number. I think that was all for the best. After all, I am not ready to for this anyway. But like I said earlier, I think I was misunderstood. The Tonying part is simply my frustrations of not having able to defend myself, this is because I chose to shield the human. I asked forgiveness because that is what I needed to do. If the angel didn't feel the sincerity of that, I don't have anything more to say.

I will not retaliate with a counter statement. For I know the cycle will go on and on because you see, I'm also opinionated like the angel. I will open my mind to the angel's statement but I ask also the they open theirs.

I'm going forward with my life. It's such a shame if I'm going to lose a friend this way, but I'm moving forward. That's life.


Photobucket