It's already October. On the 16th of this month, I will be just a month away before my 1st year anniversary with my current employer. I will then need to decide if I want to stay with the company or not. I have 1 year to think about it come my 1st year anniversary.

I can say my work is perfect for me. Just like what my good friend, Albert, told me. My skill set fits the mold of the position I have right now. Even the so called "special projects" are well suited in my skills repertoire. But despite the almost tailored carcass that is my designation, the amount of stress level and work ethic really gets to me.

I guess teamwork is not a common practice in our office. Everything is just on assignment. Everyone is assigned a specific task and they will revolve around that task without a care for others. But then again, maybe because it was simply a consensus between the members of our section. Since we have no real authoritative figure within our office, we were contented with the set-up. Even though, we were given this authoritative figure a few months ago, we were adamant with the status quo since it was system that was really working out for us.

I guess I just miss the thrill of having a team. Although everyone has their own role to play, everything comes together because we help each other. No one is left to do their own work because there will always be someone who will be willing to help them. Someone is in charge while doing the same work with the others. This was the case of CSC '08-'09, the year when student-leadership was the most fulfilling. The spirit of camaraderie and teamwork really goes beyond political affiliation.

Then we have the indefensible stress, that comes out from whimsical decisions rather than logical reasons. Just to give a pop culture reference to this, it's just like what Heidi Klum says, "One day your in and the next day your out". That's how erratic decisions in our section are. One day this is it, and the next day it will be this. I understand that there will always be stress at work, but I am defining this indefensible stress because it is just additional burden that should not have been there but exists because of erratic decisions. One such example is the one in my previous post. I was assigned to spearhead a project that I have no prior experience in organizing. It will be the end of me. I tell you. THE. END. OF. ME.

And finally we have the bossy co-workers. I will turn a blind eye if the person is a tier above me, but we are in positions of the same level. Seniority does not excuse someone to behave with proper etiquette and good manners. Saying Please and Thank you would be enough, also a proper tone of voice when asking for a favor.

I recently had a chat with a former officemate; she's been blooming ever since she got out of the hell hole called our office. And we have the same brain wavelength to conclude that "You can never understand how stressful it is in that office unless you're in it." Good for her and I'm happy for her.

Well, I can rant all I want but then again, the job is not half bad. Though I guess I lack the training required to do some of the requirements of my job. That's why they can never utilize my full potential without these trainings. I took the job because I thought I will be fulfilled. Not the lucrative pay nor the fame of working in that particular industry. Once my fulfillment cannot offset the poor work ethics or I hit my boiling point due to stress...

I'M DONE...

But that's a year from now.

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