Piano in the dark

My current favorite song
I've been listening to "Piano in the dark" by Nina. It's about a girl being fed up, and is trying to leave his boy behind. But when she finally had the courage to "walk out the door", she felt the boy's emotion while "he plays the piano in the dark", which made her think twice about leaving, "just a little more time to love him".

It seems like partly, the song is happening to me. While I was trying to let him be. Now, he's the one showing emotions. He makes I contact, keeps on touching me, keeps communicating with me. Now I'm back again from where I started. I'm confused again. Should I enter the door? or go out?

My Lab Gown
He borrowed my lab gown. I don't know why he did that. His house is pretty close to our school and we have a 2 hr break. Is he making an effort? His smell is still on my lab gown. It made me remember all our happy times. It such a shame that we lost it. Is this reconciliation?

Top 5 sweet things to do for me

5. Write me a letter
A letter about anything! Anything he or she would want to say to me. A thanks or a hate letter, I would appreciate it.

4. Sing me a song
It doesn't matter if its funny or serious. As long as it was intended for me. But oh, nothing too offending.

3. Bake for me
I'll eat anything if it was amde for me.

2. Write me a poem
A poem dedicated for me? I would really treasure it! I'll even memorize it!

1. a Hug
No words. Non-verbal Communication

5 things I want but I'm sure no one will give me

5. A Necklace
It may not be gold it may not be silver, something fancy will do.

4. A Bracelet
Same as above. It may be a symbol of our friendship, a token of appreciation etc.

3. A Silver Ring
I'm so demanding! Whahaha! It would really be special if it would be silver. It is kinda symbolic for me.

2. A used Jersey
I promise I'll wear it every day of my life!

1. The big Bear
Nothing much to say. I just want one! Ha!


Something is cracking
Crashing down.

Closely look.
Slowly having cleavage
Breaking apart.

Each shard of wounds
Jolt of pain

Falling downward
Kneeling down
Head bowed

tears flowing
Heart bleeding
Body Freezing.

Chunks of me

Read my mind. Know my thoughts
Lately, I never felt genuinely happy. There's just so many things that comes into my mind all of the same time. I always act cool and strong. But the truth is I'm really vulnerable right now. I wanted to reach out. I wanted to talk to somebody. I wanted to scream! But the thought of knowing that no one will ever hear my screams made me silent.

Listen. Hear my voice.
It feels like, I'm alone. Everyone has someone to turn to in their time of need. Well, except for me. Av has CJ, Berna has Donald and vice versa, Jes has Toto, Sir Rani has Glenda, Jabs has Glads who has Maine, Arn has Elena who has Rachel and TinTin, Jeane has Jomar, Jebs has his friends at Kuya Jun's and his FEU friends, Manong has Boss, Gypsy, even though she doesn't feel it, has Manong and Jebs. I have always been the friend who is always there. Supporting, sacrificing, being a mere observer has always been my roles. But is it really a problem if I'm the one to ask those roles from them? Am I really not that important? I'm I just a friend whom they call if they have a problem? I think being a friend is so more than that. It's about being there even though there is no problem. Being someone to share your views and share some laughs. I guess no one will argue about how I treat my friends. I'm always at their service. But right now it's my time of need. Where are they?

Look into my eyes and see my tears falling.
I'm just trying to be strong in front of him. Maybe it's my pride but I don't want him to know that I'm really hurting of what he is doing to me. He keeps giving me the cold treatment. He always keeps his distance. He jokes around with me but when I do with him he just ignores me. I always do my best not to cry. Not to look miserable when he's around. Even though in school they always see me cheerful. But within me, I am crying. Now that I think that our friendship we'll never go back from where we left it.
Sir Raniel
He says that I should not be too kind because people would take advantage of it. But from what I'm seeing, he's the one he's talking about. It's about preference. After my use, he would just threw me out as if I'm trash. Although I fell like he doesn't know what he is doing. I just couldn't grasp that he would treat me differently when he needs something from me.
I'm really jealous of Elena right now. But I'm not angry with her. I'm angry with Arnie. He doesn't communicate with me for a week, and during those times I'm constantly thinking about him only to find out that he calls Elena every night on her cellphone?! After our little trip to Nueva Ecija, after his General Assembly, after our badminton Sunday, then he would not call me or text me? and yet! He's calling Elena! It's really frustrating to know that you're not that special after all even though you felt special. I guess this is the down side of being a gay.
It's been a week since my infamous Freezing field. I'm still giving him his dose of ice cubes until he has frostbites. I don't have regrets. I would keep this up until he finally see my worth.

Touch my heart, Feel its wounds
I'm trying to drown myself with all the works in school. But the truth is, that is just my conduit to escape. I'm a coward, not being able to face problems. It's just that, I am not able to express myself to others the way they express theirs to me. Many times that I listen and gave advices. But I'm also human. I also feel the grief, the sorrow, and the pain of life. And with no one around me "to care", I feel as though I am really ALONE. I have always been alone. I just don't want to accept it. That I would always just be the "friend in times of need". It is always in my character to be caring, but now, it is I who needs caring the most. I always try hard to make a smile around people. But they always fail to see what I am inside.

"If someone wants to be part of your life, he will make an effort to be in it..."

Downloadable games

Lately, I've been addicted to games downloadable from the internet. Here are my favorites.


This is game is a brain teaser game. I love it! It makes you think about what to do with the objects that you find. And also solve pretty good puzzles.

Miss Management
This game is so hilarious! it's about being a manager of some kind of an office. You will need to supervise different persons with different personalities. This is really addicting.

Inspector Parker
This is will make you think. You're Inspector Parker, and you're to investigate the crime scene. Figure out where each person is and where are the items located by using the clues on the right side of the screen. It's really addicting!

Belle's Beauty Boutique
This game is really easy. No challenge at all. But its fun to see Belle attending to the customers' needs. Pretty addicting actually.

Hell Week!

National Chemical Engineering Week = Hell Week
I have a quiz every day! Packing Sheet!

Tuesday = Mechanics

Wednesday = Analytical Chemistry

Thursday = Organic Chemistry

Friday = Differential Equations

Saturday = Electrical Engineering Lecture

And to think we were to celebrate the 2nd National Chemical Engineering Week! Damn it!

Forlorn: Elemental Destiny. Tribes

The following are the different "humans" created by the Spirits.

Created by the Spirit Whiffling.
Creatures with Bird Wings.
The Best Warriors of Florron.

Created by the Spirit Combuster.
Creatures who can withstand high temperatures.
The Best Blacksmiths of Florron

Created by the Spirit Kelpie.
Creatures who can breathe underwater.
The Best Thinkers of Florron.

Created by the Spirit Glaze.
Creatures who can withstand low temperatures.
The Best Concealers of Florron.

Cosmos Tribe
Created by the Spirit Alluvium
Creatures who have tough skins.
The Best Defenders of Florron.

Created by the Spirit Glisten.
Creatures who have metal-like bodies.
The Swiftest in Florron.

Forlorn: Elemental Destiny. Spirits

The world of Florron was believed to have been created by Elemental spirits. Through the Spirits' harmonious power they created a world of balance where everything is beautiful and peaceful. The Spirits, being of higher order, couldn't do anything on their created world because they created a different plane of existence. Thus, they decided to make being to take care of their created world which they called "humans". Each of the Spirits created their own "Human" servant.

Element of Air.
Creator of the Wynds.
Embodied by a Bird.
Corporeal Form: A man with a bow.

Element of Fire.
Creator of the Phars.
Embodied by a Dragon.
Corporeal Form: A man with a sword.

Element of Water
Created the Shorhes.
Embodied by a Horse.
Corporeal Form: A woman with a lasso

Element of Ice.
Created the Glitz.
Embodied by a Horse.
Corporeal Form: A woman with a lance

Element of Earth.
Created the Cosmos.
Embodied by an Armadillo.
Corporeal Form: A man with a shield.

Element of Lightning.
Created the Basilius.
Embodied by a Tiger.
Corporeal Form: A woman with trident.

The Dark Adonis

The Bod
Yesterday, when we were preparing to leave the badminton center. Arnie removed his shirt. He sat beside me naked to the waist. I actually saw him topless, when I went to his house to fetch him. But I don't have my glasses on that time. It was really a suprise (and a treat! =D) to see Arnie's chest. It's slowing having shape adding to Arnie's charm. It's becoming more pleasing to the eyes (well for my eyes anyway). Kung babae lang ako! At ako ang Girlfriend ni Arnie! Malamang may anak na kame!"

The Girls
Arnie was busted with his 2 girls. And is finding a way to find a girlfriend fast! His aim before his birthday comes is to have a girlfriend. It is unknown if he would celebrate his birthday because of the family problems that they are having now.

The Grades
I saw his Prelims yesterday, and found out that he's grades is really not that good. I would personally attend to him and make sure that his grades go up.


The Vampire Prince
I found this really cool site. He goes by the name "The Vampire Prince". His pics are really artistic! With the help of his friend they created very very amazing pictures. Amazing! BREATHLESS!!! Check it out! The Vampire Prince